2021.12.04 04:03 SupaFashionable am i broken?
I am 16 and have not even began high school because of past years being re-done due to mostly being spent in therapeutic clinics.
I have a severe anxietys that i constantly think about that prevent me from doing things and i dont know where else to turn, i am afraid to talk to people in general and i think i have ptsd from moving schools when i was in 5th grade that caused me to completely break, because before then i was completely normal. any time i bring up something i think is an issue my brain tells me not to because im afraid im being an inconvenience to the other person and that my issues are someththing that i just need to get over
i currently spend my days at home sleeping or laying in bed thinking of ways to die, but then my brain tells me not to because my parents would be sad/mad because im the only one in our family that has the capability to be somewhat succesfull in life, because my brother high autisim and my sister is- just dumb.
someone please tell me what i need to do to be fixed
submitted by SupaFashionable to Advice [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 taurusmoon1141 My very comprehensive analysis of "hoax"
Fair warning, this is very long and we’re going line by line. Most is my own interpretations but I’ve also included things that I’ve heard on here and tumblr. Let’s just jump right in.
My only one
This may relate back to both the 1 and cardigan; “chase two girls, lose the one”. It was heavily debated whether or not Karlie was “the one” mentioned in both of those songs or if it could possibly be Dianna, someone we don’t know much about, or even someone new. This is Taylor confirming that it’s all for Karlie. Considering the chorus of this song - “Stood on the cliffside screaming, ‘give me a reason’”, she may be saying that Karlie is the only reason.
My smoking gun
A “smoking gun” is defined as “a piece of incontrovertible incriminating evidence”. Karlie is the evidence that Taylor is not straight. If the general public and/or certain people ever knew that, it would shake her entire world up. I mean, there’s a reason she hasn’t come out. She’s clearly not ready, but her love for Karlie makes it hard to keep a secret.
Also, there could be a connection to cardigan - “The smell of smoke would hang around this long”
My eclipsed sun
Taylor has referred to Karlie as “daylight” in the song Daylight, of course. In their Vogue “Best Friends Test” interview/video together, when Taylor is asked to pick an emoji that describes Karlie, she says “I know yours, yours is the sun”. In 2015, Taylor captions her birthday shoutout to Karlie: “Some of my best memories have been with this girl, laughing in the kitchen. Happy Birthday to the ray of light that is Karlie Kloss”. While Karlie is still the sun, there is an eclipse, so Taylor can not receive the light. It’s also notable that in the music video for The Man, there is what looks like an eclipsed sun on the wall at around 1:35. In this scene, Taylor wakes up next to a naked woman in bed (from a man’s perspective).
This has broken me down
My twisted knife
Twisting the knife means to make an already dire situation worse. The already dire situation is perhaps either the fact that they have to closet or whatever led to their separation. Karlie then made it worse by perhaps marrying Josh or sharing private information about the masters to Scooter. It could apply to several other situations but these seem the most plausible to me.
My sleepless night
Pretty self-explanatory, but interesting to note the line “I wake in the night, I pace like a ghost” from The Archer.
My winless fight
“Fighting with a true love is boxing with no gloves” from the song Afterglow, which has been connected to Karlie. That specific line about “boxing with no gloves” has been connected to a scene in the LWYMMD music video where Taylor and Karlie’s characters fight in a ring.
This has frozen my ground
This line has a lot to it. In Dancing With Our Hands Tied, which is heavily linked to Karlie, Taylor says “my love had been frozen, deep blue but you painted me golden”. In Right Where You Left Me, which is also heavily linked to Karlie, Taylor says “did you ever hear about the girl who got frozen”. The ground could also be a reference to Holy Ground.
I really think it’s most closely tied to this line from The Lakes: “A red rose grew up out of ice frozen ground, with no one around to tweet it”. This line has been attributed to Karlie. On “The Swift Life” app, there was a Taymoji of a red rose with a flame coming out of the petals, which has been connected to a photo of Taylor and Karlie holding, what do you know, a red rose with a flame coming out of the petals. Taylor used pictures of roses in her promotion of renegade.
With the red rose symbolizing their relationship, it grew out of difficult conditions (a homophobic world), but was finally able to flourish because they ran away to “the lakes”. “With no one around to tweet it” thus likely means that if they ran away together, they wouldn’t have to worry about the media.
Stood on the cliffside screaming, "Give me a reason"
A possible connection to this is me trying; “Pulled the car off the road to the lookout, could have followed my fears all the way down”. Both of these lines have tones of suicidal ideation. (I do want to note that suicidal ideation doesn’t necessarily mean you’re actually going to do anything. It can often just be a result of extreme stress that eventually passes or thoughts of “what if?”). But anyway, it seems she is asking for a reason not to jump/leave. She wants Karlie to convince her to stay. This line is just so heartbreaking because you have to be so insanely broken and distressed to think that your life isn’t worth living if it’s not with a specific person.
Your faithless love's the only hoax I believe in
I believe that by “faithless” she doesn’t necessarily mean being unfaithful like cheating - I think she means that Karlie has no faith that their relationship can work out considering the circumstances, but Taylor refuses to let go and stop believing.
I’ve seen theories that the line “you put me on and said I was your favorite” in cardigan could mean “putting someone on” as in deceiving someone and leading them on, and it makes a lot of sense, especially if you consider that the “love triangle” is a farce and the entire album is about Karlie - many say that Karlie “chose” Josh over Taylor because Karlie wanted to settle down and live a simpler life and being with Taylor didn’t allow for that.
Don't want no other shade of blue but you
This is one of the most telling lines as Taylor has consistently used blue as a descriptor in her songs about Karlie. It’s commonly used to describe a negative feeling, as in the following lines:
Red - “Losing him was blue like I’d never known”
DWOHT - “My love had been frozen, deep blue but you painted me golden”
Cruel Summer - “It’s blue, the feeling I’ve got”
Paper Rings - “I’m with you even if it makes me blue”
However, she also uses it in a mainly literal sense, likely a reference to Karlie’s eyes. It seems like nobody can agree whether Karlie’s eyes are hazel, green, or blue, but they certainly do look blue in some lighting.
Delicate - “Dark jeans and your Nike’s look at you, oh, damn, never seen that color blue”
Gorgeous - “Ocean blue eyes looking in mine, I feel like I might sink and drown and die”
“Never seen that color blue” could totally refer to eyes that look simultaneously green, blue, and hazel. The line from Gorgeous is a clear connection to Gold Rush: “Eyes like sinking ships on water, so inviting I almost jump in”. Gold Rush is about a love that never got to reach its full potential… like a closeted relationship.
No other sadness in the world would do
This confirms that the “shade of blue” means “sadness” here, and once again connects with this line from Paper Rings: “I’m with you even if it makes me blue”. This line is pretty self-explanatory overall.
My best laid plan
In I Think He Knows, she says “I am an architect, I’m drawing up the plans”. We could also assume that extensive planning went into trying to maintain their relationship despite all the hardships they had to face. It may refer to the theory that she planned to come out in Lover era but had to change it up after everything that went down with her masters. It’s also common to plan a life around somebody that you’ve been with for several years and love very much, and of course it’s always devastating when that plan comes crashing down and you have to restart. But if even her “best laid plan” can fall through, what else will or already has?
Your sleight of hand
Sleight of hand is a skill that magicians use to create illusions. Google defines the figurative meaning as “skillful deception”. This can refer to having to carefully hide one’s sexuality from the public and create the illusion of being straight, possibly referring to how upset Taylor is about Karlie marrying Josh in order to keep up the straight persona. It could also be about Karlie being deceitful. Interesting to note that throughout both verses, each one of these sentences starts with “my” except for this one.
My barren land
There doesn’t appear to be any obvious parallels between this line and other songs. However, it could be interpreted as the opposite of “the lakes” that Taylor wants to escape to with Karlie, as in the lakes Taylor talks about all the nature and the beauty of the landscape.
I am ash from your fire
In my tears ricochet, Taylor says “If I’m on fire, you’ll be made of ashes, too”. This song is mainly seen as being about Scooter but there’s also solid evidence that it’s partly about Karlie. Also, in Call It What You Want - “[S]he built a fire just to keep me warm”.
Stood on the cliffside screaming, “Give me a reason”
Your faithless love’s the only hoax I believe in
Don’t want no other shade of blue but you
No other sadness in the world would do
You know I left a part of me back in New York
So. Obvious. That it’s about Karlie. Karlie is the reason Taylor moved to NYC in the first place in 2014. Cornelia Street, Delicate, False God, Daylight - all songs that are very likely about Karlie and all take place before the relationship’s demise. She also was likely not in NYC when writing this song - she says folklore was written in the Summer of 2020 when she was supposedly in London (there’s no hard evidence placing her there, that’s just the story news outlets have been pushing, likely from Taylor’s team so they can push their narrative). Interestingly, Taylor was going to move to London in 2014 but Karlie convinced her to move to NYC. Was it supposed to be a message to her?
You knew the hero died so what's the movie for?
You knew it still hurts underneath my scars
From when they pulled me apart
The Archer - “All of my heroes die all alone, help me hold on to you”
the 1 - “You know the greatest films of all time were never made”
exile - “I think I’ve seen this film before, and I didn’t like the ending/so I’m leaving out the side door”
This may call back to her iconic lines in LWYMMD: “Sorry, the old Taylor can’t come to the phone right now. Why? Because she’s dead”. I think she’s asking herself why she’s continuing on when there’s nothing left of her and nothing left for her (the suicidal ideation in the chorus). The lines mainly reference how she was attacked by the media and got “pulled apart”, and the media hounding her was also a major factor in Taylor and Karlie’s demise. May refer to the fact that the relationship is already too far gone but they keep dragging out the pain with all their subtle blows at each other on social media, music videos, interviews, 2 whole albums, etc.
Also a potential connection to cardigan: “You drew stars around my scars but now I’m bleeding”.
You knew the password so I let you in the door
The door to the closet, perchance?
This could tie into the supposed “love triangle” in folklore.
cardigan - “I knew you’d miss me once the thrill expired, and you’d be standing in my front door light, and I knew you’d come back to me” - though interestingly these lines were not in the original version of cardigan that Taylor wrote all by herself.
this is me trying - "And maybe I don’t quite know what to say, but I’m here in your doorway”
You knew you won so what's the point of keeping score?
Possible reference to So it goes…: “You did a number on me, but honestly, baby, who’s counting? I did a number on you, but honestly, baby, who’s counting?”.
You knew it still hurts underneath my scars
From when they pulled me apart
But what you did was just as dark
Darling, this was just as hard
As when they pulled me apart
She’s essentially saying that the breakup and Karlie’s betrayal (or whatever happened between them, hard to really know) hurt just as much as the #TaylorSwiftIsOverParty. If the theory that Karlie gave Scooter confidential information on Taylor’s masters and that was the main catalyst for all of this, then these lines make sense. There are a lot of similarities between the Kimye incident and Karlie and Scooter - people went behind her back, people tried to smear her character, they both took away things that are important to her. I could probably write an entire essay on this bridge but we’re already at 5 pages so I’ll let it speak for itself.
Also, compare the repetition of “I knew” in cardigan to “you knew” in this song.
My only one
My kingdom come undone
Quite a clear callback to all her kingdom/castle/Heaven references:
King of My Heart - “We rule the kingdom inside my room”
New Romantics - “Cause baby I could build a castle out of all the bricks they threw at me”
Call It What You Want - “My castle crumbled overnight”
happiness: “I guess that’s the price I paid for seven years in Heaven”
My broken drum
You have beaten my heart
I think this set of lines here has multiple layers to it. On the surface, it’s a simple metaphor as obviously drums get beaten. But I have another idea. And please tell me if this is genius or a reach, or maybe both. In Wildest Dreams, which is theorized to be about Karlie (more on that below), she used her heartbeat as the rhythm and put it in place of a drum. Since her heart is the drum, the broken drum is her broken heart because it was (figuratively) played too much.
Also, when I first heard the line “you have beaten my heart”, I instantly thought of Stolen by Dashboard Confessional, which is the song Taylor used in her video for Emily Poe many years ago. In this song, the hook is “you have stolen my heart”. Maybe it’s just me and Taylor but I’ve definitely repurposed love songs for different people. Also, side note, Stolen has a lot of similarities to mirrorball, but it’s too much to get into here.
Don't want no other shade of blue but you
No other sadness in the world would do
I’d also like to point out the many religious references made in this song. Possible religious references include “faithless”, “barren land”, “ash from your fire”, “kingdom come undone”, and you could even say she’s asking God “give me a reason”. Taylor was raised Christian and has indicated that it is important to her though she doesn’t talk about it much in the media. Considering she was raised in the 90’s/2000’s when LGBT acceptance was significantly lower than it is today, specifically in rural Pennsylvania and then Tennessee, it’s probably safe to assume that she was taught that homosexuality is a sin.
We can see that in several other songs like Don’t Blame Me: “I would fall from grace just to touch your face”. This song also seems to be clearly about Karlie considering the daisy reference. Taylor makes subtle nods to defying religious rules in many different songs:
False God: Literally the whole song
Wildest Dreams: “He’s so tall and handsome as Hell”. Yes, this song is (at least partly) about Karlie! Remember when Taylor said Karlie is “tall like a giraffe”? Check out all the giraffes in the background of the WD music video. And it’s clear Taylor has always been enamored by Karlie’s height as Taylor is probably used to always being the tallest woman in the room until Karlie came along. Considering the line before this one is “but this is gonna take me down” - I really think it’s talking about the threat of Hell for homosexuality.
Cruel Summer: “Devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes”. It’s like the devils are betting on her letting the “evilness of homosexuality” take over her and the angels are like “not this girlie praying that we forgive her for getting bitches and models again🙄”.
Cornelia Street: “Sacred new beginnings that became my religion”. Taylor said screw you fundamentalists! She can hold her beliefs and not agree with the homophobic ideas.
happiness: “I guess that’s the price I paid for seven years in Heaven”
Again, I could go on and on but that’s probably best for another post.
Well, anyway, let me know what you guys think. Feel free to agree or disagree with anything!
submitted by taurusmoon1141 to GaylorSwift [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 jeritex-jrit 🔥 JERITEX ANNOUCEMENT- TIGER PRO #TPT- IEO LAUNCH on December 15th, 2021 🔥 Opening time for each round is at 22:00 PM (GMT+08)
| Dear Jeritex Community,|
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🔥 Trade pairs: TPT/USDT, TPT/USDR.
submitted by jeritex-jrit to JeritEX [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 ClassicGuy2010 There is a chance that you have already been to the place where you will die
2021.12.04 04:03 klooobbs [PC][Crossplay][18+] A clan for new and solo players looking for a Destiny community
The Whispering Mandrake
Summary - Relaxed yet active small community here to help new and solo players alike find community, achieve their goals, and engage with Destiny 2 the way it was always intended: with friends. We have a discord which is required. Weekly activities include raids, in-house PVP, sibling clan competitions, and more.
Onboarding - When joining the clan you'll need to accept the rules in our welcome channel to see the server. You'll be given the Blueberry role and need to play with a staff member for a bit for a "vibe-check." If you feel like the clan is a good fit and we feel like you're a good fit you'll get the Clan Member role and have unrestricted access to the whole server.
Clan Perks -
Our Discord is required to be in the clan.
🔸 Weekly raiding throughout the week 🔸 Clan Night in-house PVP nights 🔸 Titles and Rewards using the Charlemagne bot 🔸 Seasonal contests with in-game silver and discord nitro as rewards 🔸 A team of shepherds eager to teach raids and help with build-crafting 🔸 Staff opportunities to help maintain our community and new/solo players learn the ropes 🔸 A community of players who love all aspects of this game: lore, pvp, pve, min-maxing, etc.
2021.12.04 04:03 hockiklocki Czy Putin wejdzie do Ukrainy?
Amerykanie i Ukraińcy jednym głosem twierdzą, że mają informacje wywiadowcze jakoby Rosja planowała ofensywę na styczeń. Mówią o 170 tys żołnierzy.
Jakie myślicie, czy to możliwe, i jak waszym zdaniem zareaguje PiS/ polski rząd?
Jeśli rzeczywiście ma dojść do inwazji, to styczeń strategicznie byłby zrozumiały jako termin. Przy okazji zapewne zakręcą kurek z gazem.
Taki scenariusz pogrążyłby Putina ostatecznie w relacjach a Europą, jest bezsensowny ekonomicznie, więc nie widzę w tym żadnego sensu. Ale kto wie co siedzi w głowie Władimira.
Wydaje się, że Ukraińcom chodzi o przyspieszenie integracji z NATO, więc mogą straszyć, no ale jednak mają już prawie 100 tyś. wojska rosyjskiego na granicy.
submitted by hockiklocki to PolskaPolityka [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 oranges_in_the_wild Tika-karan
Today there's a fresher's "party" at our institution. They gathered all 1st year students in a line for taking photos while somebody puts tika on our forehead. Being an atheist I was immediately disgusted and wiped it off as soon as the photo was taken. Now I'm wondering if that was reasonable at all. What do you guys think? Is tika related to hinduism exclusively or is it our Indian culture? What would you have done in my place?
submitted by oranges_in_the_wild to atheismindia [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 musayyabali Shhhhhhhhhh
|submitted by musayyabali to formuladank [link] [comments]|
2021.12.04 04:03 LunarTheSpaceCat I found the electric Bike
its not a bike.
its a dog
they just showcases this to me that i found in a korvax controlled territory
insane how advanced a world grow with you
submitted by LunarTheSpaceCat to NoMansSkyTheGame [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 El_Quetzal A story alot of us can realte to
|submitted by El_Quetzal to Earth199999 [link] [comments]|
2021.12.04 04:03 GymEpop GUI update for Be Vigilant!
submitted by GymEpop to IndieDev [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 mixearch_bot LTBGY EP.163: EVILNOIZ GUESTMIX (00:29:17)
|submitted by mixearch_bot to mixearch [link] [comments]|
2021.12.04 04:03 peachyflowerrz Dairy allergy but no symptoms?
So reddit. I'm confused. Two years ago I had a cookie that made my throat swell a tad. Nothing too serious, went away after a few minutes. Probably a fluke honestly. It was a keto cookie too so yeah. Anyways, I went to the Dr about it and he did a blood test. Turns out I'm allergic to dairy, wheat, pork, and rye. The dairy was moderate level,and the others were mild. I've literally eaten those my whole life, nothing has every happened. I don't have digestive issues, I do have a bit of acne and asthma. I never talked to the Dr about it afterwards but I think I tried going off of dairy for a month but it was hard because my family wouldn't get substitutes for things and literally would just get upset if I couldnt eat something cause it had dairy. (They would say quit being difficult just EAT IT). So that didn't work, but I live on my own now and I'm wondering if I should try again? Should I see the Dr and see if they still have the test on file and see what he says? I think it's weird he didn't do anything for that. Additionally, he sent me to an allergist (because we didn't figure out the cookie problem) and the allergist took one look at the blood levels and said they were too low to count for anything. He did not however give me the skin test thing for those allergies. So idk what to do, any help is welcome
submitted by peachyflowerrz to FoodAllergies [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 OmegaTittySprinkler Historic is now the Hearthstone of Arena
|submitted by OmegaTittySprinkler to MagicArena [link] [comments]|
2021.12.04 04:03 inneedadvicex Men of Reddit I have questions
Please read my other Reddit post to fully understand.
I just want to know if I’m wasting my time.
If I sound creepy that’s not my intention, I never imagined I would like him this much.
me and him had few eye contacts. And smile at each other and exchange a lot of thank you and your welcome.
But I noticed he’s literally always on his phone, even when weren’t sitting next to each other.
The time we sit next to each other, he was literally on his phone the whole class, yes there were times he would smile at me, and we had eye contract. I made a post about this, read it to understand it but I’m shortening it because I don’t want this post to be long.
After we sat each other that first time, I noticed two situations where he choose to sit in a table full of people instead of a table with few people and had few empty chairs and that table was the one I was sitting in.
I have seen guys approach girls they interested, make effort, ask for socials.
I like him, but he doesn’t like me.
I have had guy friends and girl friends my whole life, so I saw my guy friends approaching girls all the time,
And I saw the girl friends being approached.
And for those saying he doesn’t know you yet to like you,
That’s a lie, I saw guys going up to girls asking for their socials after just meeting them.
He’s not shy, I can tell.
It’s the hard truth but I need to move on.
Guys that I want never want me, I knew this outcome the moment I realised I started to like him.
But it’s nice knowing him, and getting the chance to share few looks and smiles.
Maybe he gets a desperate vibes off me, but he can tell I’m desperate. Maybe I creep him off.
submitted by inneedadvicex to Advice [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 KimJongIlLover Min Lieblingsclub Isch jetzt 2G. Wer git mir Corona? /S
2021.12.04 04:03 Mizukidaryl What can I do to fix this?
|submitted by Mizukidaryl to Roses [link] [comments]|
2021.12.04 04:03 ASH49 24 M, I recently started talking to a girl online and we instantly hit off.
We both started flirting and planned dates etc. She did tell me she has a boyfriend but yet she continued flirting etc. A couple of days ago our chats got heated and we sexted for a while, now I am confused whether I should continue or not. Is it cheating? Cause I feel like if we continue things might get worse.
TL;DR: Met a girl online, turns out she has a boyfriend. We hooked up and now I don't know what to do.
submitted by ASH49 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 Additional-Smell-604 New and super interested in playing stormcast!!
A bit about me:
I’ve been playing big 40k for 13 months straight( and as a result feel very competent in my wargaming comprehension) and i’ve played 2018 Kill Team inconsistently, throughout that time frame, to be generous.
My question: WHERE DO I START? I bought a box of stormcast a while back and started putting the kit together slowly over the last few months. As a result slowly having my interest ramp up in this time frame. I’m wondering what good YT channels exist that hone in on stormcast or on the game as a whole. Sorry for the wordiness, But thanks for reading!!!
submitted by Additional-Smell-604 to WarCry [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 pizza__666 Replacing old wiring loom with new one
Have an Apr 50 (bad 2 strokes I know) but would it be easier for me to try replace it? I'm relatively new to riding and very new to tinkering, should I just take it to a garage or will they overcharge me? Lol
submitted by pizza__666 to motorcycles [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 pinkmariposa Almost 40(F, Arizona) crazy scientist looking for friends
I have a lot if idle time during the day while my experiments run and would like to meet chat buddies to share experiences about books, movies, crafts, life in general. I am not looking for anything romantic, just friendship!
A little bit about me, I am 39 years old, originally from Mexico but moved to the US 2 years ago for my new job and to be with my now husband. I love music, movies, books, cats, food and cooking. I am also trying to learn how to pain with acrylics as well as miniature house building.
Nice to meet you! 😊
submitted by pinkmariposa to FriendsOver40 [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 galintgaming Join us all weekend long for the Galint Melee Open: Fall Edition ft. Hungrybox, n0ne, Lucky, Soonsay, iBDW, and more on twitch.tv/btssmash & twitch.tv/galintgaming! Support grassroots Melee 🔥. Full event details inside!
QUICK LINKS: TWITTER SEEDING NA Singles Bracket NA Doubles Bracket EU Singles Bracket Merch Shop twitch.tv/btssmash twitch.tv/galintgaming VODs
Hello everyone, we're excited to be hosting the fourth iteration of the Galint Melee Open series all weekend long. At the Galint Melee Open Fall Edition we've got...
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submitted by Beginning-Bass1470 to SatoshiBets [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 04:03 gloomyinsomniac I cannot. I was always nice to Robyn but this was it for me 🙄
2021.12.04 04:03 PappaWenko Yet another complain post.
I'm playing on the least populated server on EU (Perseus). I woke up early today and I thought: ''Early Saturday morning, odd hour, I guess I get the grind going and get myself to 45, black mecha shouldn't be that populated at this time''. How wrong I was... I literally can't get a spot because it's so f*cking packed with people.
Why are they not adding more channels to black mecha so people can actually play this game.
submitted by PappaWenko to ElyonOnline [link] [comments]